not being able to sleep is possibly one of the most frustrating feelings in the world! My thoughts don't seem to slow down lately. There is always so much on my mind. Searching and begging God for continued guidance on the next steps in my life really have consumed me. When that is not the point. The point of my petty existence is to bring Him glory!!! To KNOW Him and make Him known! I have to KNOW Him first! He does confirm and guide in His perfect timing! And i truly believe He is guiding me!
It's hard when I feel so confident about a decision one way and then I realize the realities of that decision. Some of those things are hard. Some of those sacrifices are very hard to make. It's not going to be comfortable. But more than all of that, I want to be in the center of His will. However, I was reminded last week that God's will is not just a tight rope that if we make a wrong a move, or take the slightest wrong step we fall out of His grace. NOT AT ALL!!!! His will is more like a valley. We are free to wander around and explore and enjoy the many blessings He gives us. And He does often give us an option. He gives us choices. The choices all being good options. In this case, I search out my heart, my status, my responsibilities that I have been entrusted with, and most importantly, I search out the desires of my heart. The desires that God has given me. Based on that, I choose. He has given me options so that I can be confident that whatever I chose will be what I am convinced of...it won't just be a "that-was-my-only-option" decision.
But in ALL of that, the FIRST thing I must do, is love my Lord. Rest in His embrace. Listen to His gentle words.
But seek first the kingdom of God and his righteousness, and all these things will be added to you. Matthew 6:33
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